“The Usual” (09/21/2026)

I have longed for roots since I was a child, that sense of belonging to the community rather than being a newcomer or worse, an outsider. Between my father’s employment and my husband’s, I moved frequently. But I have finally settled in a small city, Lake Mills, Wisconsin. And while there are those who still remind me that I’ve decades to go before “belonging,” there are some who have embraced me and accepted me.

Yesterday, for instance, at Mass, during communion, I was in my pew praying when I felt a hand on mine. I looked up to see a parishioner whom I usually speak to on my way in or out of church. I hadn’t seen him for some time. I took the tap as a sign of being missed which is one of the gifts of belonging.

Then after church, we were invited to donuts in the parish hall. I got my donut and juice and looked around for a place to sit. I noticed the family that always sits behind me. They already had their plates and were at a table near the front. I made my way there. And within moments of sitting down, we were chatting and laughing. There was a level of comfort that made me feel welcome.

It’s not just at church that I have come to feel like I belong. Key among those who have accepted me and welcomed me are the people in the service industries of our small city – the wait staffs at the cafés and dinner spots and the usual vendors at the Farmer’s Market on the city square. I realize I belong when they call me by name and ask me if I’d like “the usual.” It reminds me of the series “Cheers” about the bar of friends where everyone knows your name.

Belonging is part of our wiring. Our journey is about believing, becoming, and belonging. I’ve learned that so many on the way focus on believing, on our faith, and on becoming, on our conversions. They are so important. But in my opinion, it is the belonging that stands out for me not just because of my own craving for it but because, ultimately, it is all about relationships and that starts with belonging.

Over the years, I have learned that belonging to the LORD as a daughter is my true calling. It is my compass. It helps me to pick up my faith and to lay down my own desires for the will of my Heavenly Father. I have learned that as a sister in Christ and of Christ, it is in Him, and with Him, and through Him that I will ultimately find my way to my final destination, life in abundance at the heavenly throne with my LORD and a community where everyone has a place. But daily I am reminded that my love of the LORD whom I cannot see is best demonstrated by my love of my sisters and brothers whom I can. And so, I work to build unity and community however and whenever possible.

As we continue to journey in faith, hope and love, let us hold our relationships dear and commit to working on them in earnest every day. Let us seek to be bridge builders, community builders, unity builders. Let us focus on what we have in common rather than on how we are different. Let us look for ways to include others, to invite others, to welcome others, knowing in our own heart the need for belonging. Let us encounter others with joy and smiles that say, “I see you.” Let us take the time to learn one another’s names and to recognize one another’s gifts so we might better invite others to join with us in building the Kingdom here on earth.

Until tomorrow, let us all love well.