All In (01/02/2025)

Yesterday was the Solemnity of Mary, a holy day. I made plans. Actually, I made three separate plans for attending Mass. My life is rather fluid which is another way of saying that things have a way of happening that change my plans; it’s the LORD’s way of keeping me flexible. At the end of the day, I must admit to wondering if it had all been a test of my commitment.

Plan A was to go to the 5:30 p.m. Mass on New Year’s Eve at my home church in Lake Mills. However, my son arrived for a visit and at 5:30 I was serving dinner. But I told myself it would be all right because there was a Mass the next morning in the nearby town of Johnson Creek.

Plan B was to attend that liturgy at 8 a.m. I prayed as I drove to the church, parked, entered and selected the third pew from the front. I knelt down and began my preparatory prayers when I looked up and realized there was a forest of poinsettias only feet away. I’m really allergic to poinsettias. They cause my asthma to act up. This wasn’t going to work. So, I exited that pew and moved to the rear of the church, the last pew. I sat down feeling secure that I was far enough away from the poinsettias. I waited and prayed but began feeling uneasy.

After 10 minutes, Father entered, we sang the entrance hymn, and then Father began by incensing the altar. While poinsettias cause my asthma to act up, incense sends me into a bronchial asthmatic episode every time. Now I understood the sense of uneasiness, the charcoal burning with residue incense had been in the air. I exited my pew, found the usher and asked for a way to get out quickly. He led me to the stairs that took me through the basement and then back up and out the door. And then I went to my car, apologized to the LORD, and drove home asking for help coming up with another option.

Plan C, my final option, ended up being Mass on YouTube. Not my first choice, not even my second. But I know the LORD knows I tried, and I was afraid of another run in with incense if I tried another church. I know the LORD knows I was all in. I had a plan that went awry. So, I made a second plan that seemed to be working until it wasn’t. But finally, Plan C went without a hitch. As the Mass ended, I felt a sense of great blessing. I wish it had been in person, but I believe the LORD knows I tried.

Commitment is a real part of discipleship; following Jesus can’t be sporadic or convenient. Our journeys are ones of conversion, and we all know change takes commitment. Every day we are asked to draw closer, to shed more non-essentials, to work harder on the essentials, to be “all in.” Jesus warned us, “I anyone would come after me, let him deny self, take up his cross, and follow me” (Matthew 16:24). But Jesus promises us life if we follow: “For whoever wishes to save his life will lose it, but whoever loses his life for my sake will find it” (Matthew 16:25).

Perhaps yesterday’s scrambling was a test. Not a bad way, really, for starting the new year and helping me to remember who I am called to be all the time, not just when it is easy or convenient.

As we go forward into this new year of 2025, let us be people of purpose, resolute in our commitment to Christ and in growing our relationship with the LORD and one another. May this year be one marked by us being "all in."

Until tomorrow, let us all love well.