Blanks (07/27/2024)

When I was younger, I loved to draw and paint. There was something about that blank space and no limitations on what could fill it that urged me on. I was also a writer who never met a blank piece of paper I didn’t delight in changing to a log of thoughts and dreams. But this morning I find this blank screen intimidating. What can I make of nothing? Age doesn’t always give us wisdom; sometimes age brings with it doubts. What do I have that will matter? What am I being asked to share, to do?

I am reminded of the jester’s line in King Lear: “Can you make no use of nothing?” And I find myself taking this to the LORD. LORD, You created all goodness from nothing. You are love itself expressed moment to moment in your power and presence in my world, in my life, in me. Help me, LORD. Inspire me this morning as I sit with no ideas only a desire to act as You call me to act, with love for You and love for all.

And I recognize now that in that emptiness, in that “nothing,” in that blank that clamors to be filled is promise and the answer. I am reminded of the lost sheep the Good Shepherd comes to find. This morning, for some time, I sat lost staring at a blank screen. And then it dawned on me. Just start. Pray to the LORD, and then just start.

Indecision can stop us. It can rob us of what we can do, of what we are being called to do. It is in the LORD that “we live and move and have our being.” This morning when I was willing to set my doubts, my desires, my fears down, I found I was free to live and move and write.

And I realized all over again how the LORD is here, how the LORD guides and inspires. The “nothing” I was experiencing wasn’t an impediment or a cross to bear but actually the point of the moment. When I could set down what I wanted, I had the freedom to pick up what the LORD was offering.

Our journey is one of discovering ourselves but always within the context of who we will always be, beings created by an all-loving and ever-present LORD who gifted us for a particular role in this world, His world. And in His love for us, the LORD gave us freedom.

We choose. And I am reminded of a third quote from the movie “Indiana Jones and the Last Crusade” where the ancient knight warns, “Choose wisely, for as the true grail will bring you life, the false grail will take it from you.”  And I recognize in this moment that the “false” choice is the one with me at the center, where it is all about me. Nowhere in the LORD’s divine design will selfishness ever appear.

As we journey, what will we make of the bare stretch in front of us? What is the LORD calling us to do? Who is the LORD calling us to be. Can we bring all we are to bear upon the moment while simultaneously setting down all our selfish desires? Can we open ourselves to what the LORD wills?

Until tomorrow, let us all love well.